20th June 2014 | by MFC Team
Making time to conceive
My name is Rose. I’m a 36 year old human rights lawyer. I’ve been with my partner, Tom for about 5 years. He’s a 38 year old pilot. Both of our jobs require a lot of travel and keep us pretty busy, so we often spend a lot of time apart. We’re excited to start a family now that we both feel ready, and anticipate that once we have a child, we’ll be able to find a way to spend more time at home together. About 6 months ago I went off my birth control pills and started tracking when I was ovulating. The only problem is that there’s such a small window when I’m fertile each month, and for 4 of the last 6 months, that’s been exactly when Tom has been away for work. The two months that we were in the same place at the right time, having sex felt a bit rushed and forced. I was in the middle of a pretty high profile human rights case and pretty stressed out. It was disappointing but not surprising that we didn’t get pregnant.
Frankly, trying to conceive is much less romantic and fun than I thought it was going to be. Having to keep track of when I’m ovulating and having sex “on schedule” feels a lot like work. When Tom and I spoke last night, I brought it up, and was surprised to hear that he felt the same way too. We looked at when I’d be ovulating next month, and what our work schedules looked like during that time. Tom will be on a layover in Paris for a few days. One of the perks of Tom working for an airline is that I can fly standby for free. So we’ve decided that I’m going to fly over and meet him in the city of love. Sounds like the perfect place to conceive, doesn’t it? We talked about trying to take off some of the pressure of trying to get pregnant, and just enjoy each other’s company. We definitely need to spend some quality time together given how little time we’ve spent together in the last 6 months. Whether or not we get pregnant in Paris, the time together will be good for us. We’ve committed to making it a priority to spend more time together over the next 6 months. We’ve also decided to stop stressing out about getting pregnant and try to see it more like an adventure. If we get pregnant, then it’s a bonus. If after 6 months we’re not pregnant yet, then we’ll reassess our options.
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